Hey Guys, My name is Amy Burchell and I am a huge Kutless fan and have been able to see you guys in concert several times. Like many other fans, I have felt the impact of many of your songs in my life, but the hardest hitting one is “Even If.” Back in March of 2009, I lost my oldest sister and my nephew. They were murdered by my brother-in-law. he only got 8 years in a mental institution. I can’t even begin to explain the pain I felt and how betrayed I felt. Since then, I have struggled in my faith and it has been a constant whirlwind of up and downs in my faith. However, at the time that Believer came out I was in one of my extreme low points. Nothing was going right in my life (or so it seemed) and I did not see any real chance of change. I became depressed and I shut down. All I could think about was how much pain I felt, which lead to me nearly losing my job and failing out of college. Somehow, though God must have known what I needed to hear, because believer came out and my dad brought it for me. I listened to the CD and when I heard “Even If” I had to play it again. I prayed and peace came over me. I was also reminded of a scripture I had studied in Bible class when I was when High School. Revelation 21:4 , “And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.” With this verse, I was reminded that one day I wouldn’t hurt anymore and I would see them again. In a manner of speaking, your song helped bring me back to life and to me to my knees so God could use his word to speak to me. Your music still brings me to that place. It is truly a blessing. May God continue to bless all of you!
Kim Mcnamara Mcnamara
Hello Kutless! Two weeks after buying “Believer” a good friend, and sister in the Lord passed away due to cancer. The evening before she passed I watched the slide show video of “even if” on youtube. Having been blessed by this song, my thoughts were put in the right perspective, remembering the awesomeness of our God and His ways are not our ways. The healing may not have come in this life for her but God chose to heal her in taking her home. Also, I would like to mention that the entire cd has blessed me spiritually in opening my eyes to Gods mercy and grace, helping me to pull out of a pit that I’ve been in for quite sometime. You are such a blessing to me! May God continue to bless you in all that you do! <3 kim mcnamara 🙂
My name is Emily Greenwood; I am such a hard-core Kutless fan that if we were standing face to face right now, I am sure you would recognize me. I became a Kutless fan when I was in seventh grade in 2004; and I have gone to at least one kutless a year since then. I am now 21 years old and going into my third year of college. I hope my testimony encourages you guys. The song, “Even If” is the story of my life. I was born with cerebral palsy, which is a brain injury that occurs shortly before or after birth. Cerebral palsy inhibits muscle function and leaves me unable to walk. As a young child I had many questions like; “Why would God not give me the ability to walk?” In addition to having cerebral palsy I also had epilepsy. During my seizures I was completely aware of what was going on around me, however, I could not communicate with those around me, yet God was there with me telling me it was going to be okay. These events caused me to accept Christ at an early age. At the same time, I was running out of options for my condition. Thankfully though, my parents had heard of the ketogenic diet, which consisted of absolutely no sugar, high fat, and little carbs. I was on the diet for two years and haven’t had a seizure since! This is the only part of my disability than no longer affects me and proof that god is “…working all things for our good.” Through the years the obstacles I face have become different as I age such as; various feet problems, mobility limitations, issues with muscle tightness, skulliosis, etc… Circumstances are that I can no longer move from my chair to another piece of furniture with without help because of scoliosis. I had a ninety degree curve in my spine for which I have had two back surgeries. The bar that they installed in my back keeps me humble. Also, because of my surgeries, one of my other favorite Kutless songs is, “To Know That You’re Alive”. There were also other obstacles I faced aside from physical problems. For a long time I struggled with the fact that I could not go on mission trips around the world with my youth group. It is only within the last five years that I have realized my mission field is not to other countries, but is to the disabled community here at home. One thing that has happened in recent years though, is that as a senior in high school, I really looked forward to going away to college after graduation, but through various circumstances I didn’t end up going away. Even though I got into four of the five schools I applied to (Two of which were University of California schools), through special circumstances, god showed me that it wasn’t his plan for me to go away to college yet. I was really upset, but I knew that, “Even if the healing doesn’t come And life falls apart/And dreams are still undone/You are God You are good/Forever faithful” Even though the song hadn’t come out yet, through various life experiences, my thoughts echoed the words of the song. Although God’s love never changes it is only my perspective that has changed. I used to think of my disability as something that I needed to overcome for Christ to fully use me. It is because of my disability that I have to rely not only on Jesus Christ but on others as well. Although I have to depend on other people on a daily basis it is that dependence on others that makes me a perfect candidate to witness to disabilities to Christ. So even if Christ does not bring healing he will always provide what I need to achieve his plan for my life, not my plan for my life. One thing that I always remind myself is that, “Lord we know your ways are not our ways/ So we set our faith in who You are.
This is just a quick… uh… okay… extremely LONG note to let you know that I have officially become your biggest fan!
I’ve enjoyed your music ever since I was first introduced to it a couple of years ago. As a matter of fact, my husband and I are the youth ministers for a small group of incredible kids and in 2008 when we chose a name, we insisted on “Strong Tower Youth” Can you guess what song we play every Wednesday night? I bet you can! 🙂 Last spring we attended Young Christian’s Weekend at Silver Dollar City. We traveled several hours just to hear Kutless. We waited all day. It was sleeting/snowing/raining and FREEZING! The rides were all closed due to the weather but the kids insisted on staying for the concert. They were SO excited! Then… came the bad news…. remember… yep.. Jon Micah was snowed in at an airport! Total bummer! The kids were a little disappointed but completely understood. We were suppose to leave early the next morning, but we called all of their parents and fortunately were able to stay long enough to see your early worship service. We missed the actual concert that afternoon but they did hear Strong Tower Live! So they were completely content! 🙂
Okay… so thanks to a great group of kids, so starts my Kutless fascination. Then many months later, I’m driving home and “Shut me Out” comes on the radio. I had heard this song a hundred times before, but suddenly the words began to sink in. It was EXACTLY the way I had been feeling. It was during a time in my life when it seemed all four walls were closing in on me. People that I had known and loved all of my life where turning on me. They were making choices in their lives that biblically I could not support. God began dealing with me on the TRUE meaning of LOVE. Love is not idly standing by and watching someone you care about destroy themselves. Love is not patting them on the back and saying..”It’s okay! I understand! You’ve had a hard life or You just don’t know any better.” Love is taking a stand and saying…”If you do not stop…You’re heading down a road the WILL destroy you!” Sometimes Love is tough! If I knew someone would step outside of a building and instantly be struck down by a bus and yet I did nothing to warn them… is that Love? No… Love is doing everything in my power to protect someone even if it means losing them! I felt like I was losing some of the most important people in my life because I was standing for what I felt was right! I loved them… but I did not compromise what is right! “Shut Me Out” hit home at the precise time that I needed it! And you know, In hindsight, I can see how much MORE these people respect me now for not backing down!!
Now comes the big one… “What Faith Can Do” holds a special place in my heart. It is not just some ordinary, feel good tune! Oh no… I have LIVED this song! I truly believe it was written for my family! God inspired… it IS the story of my daughter Serenity!!! Born with three congenial heart defects and later diagnosed with restrictive cardiomyopathy, the doctors told us our options were heart transplant or certain death. Day in and Day out, I stood beside her bed and read healing scriptures over her. The nurses would walk by and stare, but I continue to read aloud. We came extremely close to losing our daughter several times, but we stood on God’s promises for complete healing! There were times when I think the doctors actually thought I was so far into denial that I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. They began to worry that I was not prepared for what the future held. One doctor kept saying.. “You just don’t understand. This condition ONLY progresses. Your daughter’s heart will continue to harden until it can no longer function.” Then he continued to add all the horrible side effect possibilities that a heart transplant could bring. We were told, a heart transplant usually only lasts an average of seven years, then it must be performed again and usually along with a lung and/or kidney transplant. This can be quite scary when you’re dealing with an infant. What kind of hope of a normal life expectancy does that offer a newborn. If it were not for our Hope in Jesus Christ, we would have had no hope at all. But, it was our doctors job to keep us grounded! So he kept saying..”You just don’t understand.” I looked him straight in the eye and with a big smile on my face, I said…”YOU just don’t understand how BIG our GOD IS.” He shrugged his shoulders and gave me one of those…”well I tried” looks. We never denied the facts…. We knew exactly what our daughter was facing. We just chose to believe the TRUTH! The world said our daughter was sick… but GOD said our daughter WAS HEALED. We chose to believe the God who can NOT lie! Several weeks later, after a heart transplant evaluation and after a doctor’s report to be placed on the heart transplant list, they performed a third heart cath and the results were amazing! The myopathy was GONE! The condition that is known to ONLY progress, completely resolved! They immediately withdrew her name from the list! A few weeks later, she did go through open heart surgery, but sailed through it. Today she is three years old and she is transplant free, medication free, and I am energy free from chasing her! 🙂 She continues to have annual checkups and her doctor continues to be amazed! Last checkup, he said she had NO restrictions because her echocardiogram looked perfect!
After I heard “What Faith Can Do.” I immediately went home and set her testimony pictures to the music. Serenity watches her youtube video several times a day and she has declared it… HER SONG! If anyone tries to sing along, she screams..”NO! Don’t you sing that! It’s MY song!” 🙂 One day her 4 year old brother Eli was watching with her and he asked…”Reni why are you in da hospital!” Serenity replied..”Cause my heart was broken, but then Jesus fixed it!” I am so grateful for a Savior who makes broken hearts brand new!!!
Yes… “What Faith Can Do” is the story of my daughter’s life. I absolutely adore the song! I would only make one tiny revision… It should be called “What FaithWILL Do!” 🙂
I bought your latest worship CD for “What Faith Can Do.” But recently I can’t stop listening to “Amazed” It’s been on repeat all day today and I’m planning on using it for worship service on Sunday! So like I said…I am now officially your biggest fan!! The youth group will be traveling to Tulsa Oklahoma February 5th to attend the “Until the whole world Hears tour” with Casting Crowns! How incredibly awesome is THAT team up!! We are completely stoked!! Strong Tower Youth just has one request for you… “This time… please please PLEASE bring a snow plow along to the airport!” 🙂
Okay.. so I’m finally finished! Hope I didn’t bore you too much! May God richly bless your band as you continue to do God’s work! See you in February!! Until then we continue to rock and worship with you!
Several years ago, when I was 43, I was diagnosed with high blood pressure, high cholesterol and signs of insulin resistance (pre-diabetic). I was prescribed medications to protect me from more serious conditions, but these drained my stamina. Already struggling with fatigue related to being over-weight, I was forced to take afternoon naps and lacked the energy I needed to be a good parent to my children. I felt extremely old and feared I was also becoming depressed.
I began trying to eat more sensibly (smaller portions, lower fat and fewer carbs) and was very excited about my next doctor’s visit because I had lost 16 lbs. But the doctor told me it was not enough and she planned to increase my medications to protect me from heart attack and stroke. I cried and pleaded with her to give me another chance to make changes before increasing my medications. She agreed, but I felt so defeated, and by the time I arrived home, I was sobbing and at a breaking point before God. I needed to begin exercising and as I sobbed God met me in my brokenness and encouraged me. He gave me the shot of inspiration I needed by challenging me to become who He had created me to be.
Still, exercise was not pleasant…in fact it was painful, because I was still heavy. It was difficult too because of the drug induced fatigue I was fighting. But God again gave me what I needed to spur me on to beat the odds and this is where Kutless comes into the formula for my victory. After hearing the single, “Sea of Faces” playing on our local Christian radio station I was compelled to purchase the CD. The words were deep and powerful and reminded me just how important I am to God. As I listened I found the lyrics to many of the songs to be like a prayer…not unlike my own cries for God to help me through these health related struggles. While song lyrics connected me with God, the driving music gave me the sense of “fight” I needed to get out and run/walk every day. I became empowered in the challenge God had given to me and became filled with the hope and assurance that nothing is impossible with God.
I purchased the self-titled CD and found fresh motivation to finish out my summer of exercising and eating right. Exercise time became an extension of my quiet time with God. It was pure joy and the part of my day when I put my faith and trust into action and pushed myself hard. I was stretched and challenged by this time with God, without the other distractions of life, and while listening to Kutless. Your God inspired words of faith and hope ministered to my soul.
I grew tremendously in my faith as God transformed me spiritually and physically. As evidence of His work…my size dropped from Women’s 16 to a Junior size 5! Truly a miracle of God! My blood pressure is now in safe ranges, using only the smallest dose of medication to keep it in check. My doctor pulled all of the cholesterol and the diabetic medications I was taking. She even went as far as to describe me as “poster girl” for “cleaning up my lifestyle”. None of this could have been accomplished without God’s grace and the motivation I found through your music.
In the autumn of that victorious year, I had opportunity to attend my first Kutless concert. I was so blessed to see each of you perform in person, and that evening, Kutless went from being a band I listened to in my CD player while exercising, to being real and very special people who I pray for daily and keep tabs on as if you were family.
God has and will continue to use each of you in mighty ways…of that I can and do testify. God was able to meet me in the midst of your music and effect great changes that still amaze those who knew me before this transformation and who see me now. Kutless continues to be my motivation as I seek to increase my fitness level and remain healthy and free from medications!
God bless you as you continue to represent Him well!
Gentleman… my name is Brian Smith. I am a 51 year old father of 4 ranging in age from 20-27. I know my kids are probably more in your demographic than I am, but your music speaks to me very much. Thank you for using the gifts that the Lord has given you in such an awesome way. I wanted to take a moment to share a story with you briefly. I love music. I love singing. I am an active vocalist in my church. I had felt this real calling to perform your song “What Faith Can Do” for special music one Sunday. I presented my vision to our music director. It was a vision where while I sang, we have a slide show/video playing on the big screen behind me showing some of the life changing miracles that our church body has experienced lately. I felt this was going to be a moving, Spirit-lead, emotional moment that I was going to be a part of. That got put on hold. On Monday June 3rd, my daughter Angela, who was 8 months pregnant with my first grandchild, was taken to the hospital quickly because her blood pressure was dangerously high and the doctors wanted to do an emergency C-section. We all rushed to the hospital but were lead to a room to wait for more information. Moments later a nurse came and asked for just me. JUST ME?!?!? In a room crowded with family they wanted me to join them in the delivery room. My grandson, Brayden Keith Reinecker, was born four weeks early, and was not breathing on his own no matter what they tried. So as they continued to resuscitate him, the nurse told me that my daughter wanted me to baptize Brayden before they allowed the doctors to stop assisting in his breathing. I couldn’t talk. Here I am, a child of God, yet a common man, asked to baptize his own grandson. This was honestly one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. So, since I am not ordained or educated in the ways of baptisms, I simply asked everyone in the delivery room to lay their hands on Brayden while I presented him to Christ. Since “What Faith Can Do” is one of my favorite songs, I prayed loud and hard to God that He would breathe life into Brayden… because I knew He could. I trusted that He could and that He would. I pleaded with God to perform a miracle that day and to allow Brayden to touch the lives of those in that room. But God had other ideas. Brayden passed an hour after being born. Angela and Keith (my son in law) were allowed to keep Brayden’s body with them for 24 hours. So he was cleaned and dressed and Angela held him. We all held him. And for those next 24 hours I continued to pray for that miracle. It never came. But there were some things happening with some of the family. Some very spirit-filled, emotional things. There are some in our family that don’t know Christ like we’d like them to. I believe God was speaking to them during this time. Anyway… I couldn’t listen to “What Faith Can Do” without crying for the next month. BUT… another favorite of mine is “Even If the Healing Doesn’t Come”. Trust me… the heartache DID hit me like a hurricane and the weeks to follow were very painful… but at the end of the day, I knew God has a plan for my family. I trust Him. I believe. So, thank you for your music. Thank you for reminding all of us that being a child of Christ doesn’t mean that life is going to be easy… or going to be perfect. Sometimes when we beg God for a miracle (and trust me… I’ve never begged for one so hard in my life) …in His loving way… for reasons we don’t understand… He says, “No my child”. You guys are truly lead by the Spirit and you are appreciated more than you know. God Bless You. Brian Smith Romans 8:28
Hey Guys,just want to really thank you for doing “Even If”. it’s been a huge encouragement for me. It’s been a really broken past few years for me. Lost my brother a couple years ago in an accident, had some really bad personal stuff happen to me, and now both of my parents are terminally ill and i’m the primary care taker…, just to name a few of the main things that have gone on. And sometimes it’s hard to keep going and keep praising God. But this song has really encouraged me lately, reminding me that regardless of the circumstances, God is still Good, and absolutely worthy of all our praise. Forever. And there’s such a difference between if someone tells you this, and hearing it in a song… there’s like a grace on the song, That it isn’t spoken with a bite, but it hits my heart just right, and the truth gets in. I don’t know if that makes sense, but it’s the only way I know how to say it. And so in these days when I don’t think I can keep going, and I break down and feel like running away… I find a quite spot and crank this song and just cry… and get re-centered. Thank You. God Bless. – Miranda
Jeff & Julie Naperville, IL
My husband and I are blessed with 3 sons (ages 12, 7, and 4). Our two older boys were able to see you in concert with us. We live in the Chicago area and we saw you in Peoria, IL. We were extremely blessed by your music, along with the Newsboys and Newworldson. You are right about music impacting the human soul. I am so grateful for your music. Our youngest son, Joel was born prematurely at 28 weeks. He was in the hospital entirely for the first 17 months of his life, because his lungs were extremely premature. He had to have a tracheotomy and he was on a ventilator 24 hours a day. He came home like that and we had home health nursing. To make a long story short, he is completely healed. He can breathe on his own and doesn’t have a trach anymore. Praise God! What we are challenged with now is the fact that our 4 year old son is severely developmentally behind. Even though he is 4 years old, he is at an 11 month level of development. The fact that God has healed him in the medical sense is a miracle, but I would lie if I told you I wasn’t discouraged that he isn’t walking or talking yet (but hopefully soon!). I wanted to give this praise, even though Joel isn’t walking or talking, he loves music. He loves your music. I have it loud in the car and at home. I swear even though he can’t talk, it sounds like he is trying to sing, especially to the song “All Of The Words”. Your music ministers to my son’s soul even though he doesn’t understand it mentally, his spirit knows and worships God, I believe. Not only does it minister to him, it ministers to our other two sons. At their young age, they are sharing your music with friends who are unsaved. What an impact you are making on the young generation by singing lyrics of positive words and songs that glorify Jesus. Not to mention that you have helped me through difficult times. As a mom of a special needs son, life can be difficult and try to zap the joy of the Lord from you, but once again praise God for great Christian music as yours. I purchased the Strong Tower CD and was listening to it a lot. My husband noticed a change in my attitude. He noticed that the joy of the Lord was in me. So, thank you for allowing us to experience that through your music. We also wanted to say thank you for meeting with all of your fans after the concert. It was special for our boys to have you and Newworldson sign their CD’s and let them meet you. That is inspiring them to continue to play guitar and piano for the Lord. We know that God will continue the great work in you and will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus (Phil 1:6). Julie Holtz Naperville, IL
I wanted to share with you our very emotional and what I believe is very inspirational story. I think it is a true testament to not only the power of faith, but the power of music as well.
My husband and I found out in April of last year that we were going to be having a baby. Our first together, but we both have children from previous marriages so in total, it was our 8th! From the beginning, the pregnancy was not smooth sailing. We decided early on that if this baby was a girl her name would be Faith Elizabeth and if it was a boy he would be Riley James. Being a mom, I was about 99% sure from the start it was a girl. We kind of adopted the song What Faith Can Do as the babies song. When we went for our first doctor’s appointment they did an ultrasound and could not see a heartbeat. I was an emotional mess. My husband, being the amazing and strong man that he is reminded me that God would take care of us and we had to have faith. A week later we went for another ultrasound and we saw that precious heartbeat as strong as could be. At 20 weeks we had an ultrasound and found out that we were having a girl, our little Faith Elizabeth. A week later, we found out that I had an abnormal result for quad-screen, which indicated that the baby could have Down’s Syndrome. Again, I was an emotional mess at first and again my husband reminded me that everything happens for a reason and that it was all in God’s hands. We went for another, more detailed ultra-sound to look for any signs or markers for Down’s. Everything looked perfect. Our Faith was as perfect as could be. A few weeks later, at 24 weeks, I started to show signs of pre-term labor. A test showed that I had a 20% chance of delivering in the next 2 weeks. The doctor put me on bed rest and started steroid shots to strengthen Faith’s lungs. Again, me an emotional mess, but getting a lot better about giving it to God (thanks once again to my husband) and knowing that he would take care of us, like he has through this whole time. Two weeks later, another ultrasound showed that my cervix was normal and preterm labor was not happening. I am thinking, ok we got all that out of the way, we should be smooth sailing from here on out, right? Boy was I wrong! At 35 weeks, I went in for a normal check up and the doctor noticed that Faith had not yet turned to be head down. She told us that we still had time for her to turn, but that she might not. She was preparing me for the possibility of having to have a c-section. After much thought and prayer, my husband and I decided to go ahead with the c-section and it was scheduled for December 21st. On the morning of the 21st, we made our way to the hospital. At the hospital they put an IV in me, drew blood and then tried to start the spinal to numb me for the surgery. The anesthesiologist was having a lot of trouble placing the spinal and decided she would call for back-up. While she was doing that, my doctor decided to do one more ultrasound just to make sure Faith hadn’t turned to the head down position. I am very glad she did. Our little gymnast had flipped and there was no need for a c-section anymore. Because I was only 38 weeks along, they didn’t want to induce me yet, so they sent us home. At my next check-up, my doctor scheduled an induction for the following Monday, December 27th. On the morning of the 27th, once again we wake up early and checked in to the hospital. When we get settled into our birthing room, the nurses come and hook me up to all the monitors and check on the baby. Our little gymnast had flipped again and was once again breech! My doctor had not yet arrived for the day, so the nurses decided to just keep monitoring me and wait till the doctor came in. We would decide when the doctor came in if we wanted to do the c-section or try to manually turn the baby. Three hours later, my doctor arrives and checks me over only to find that our little gymnast had flipped again! The doctor broke my water and labor was underway. Our perfect little blessing was born at 5:03 pm on December 27th weighing in at 7 lbs 3 ounces and 20.5 inches long.
The next morning, after a wonderful night of with this perfect little angel, the doctor came in with some unexpected news. The nurse had taken Faith to the nursery to give her some shots and noticed that her lips were a little bit blue and she looked what they called ‘dusky.’ The doctor hooked her up to a pulse-ox monitor and her oxygen saturation, which should be in the high 90’s, was in the upper 70’s to lower 80’s. Faith’s pediatrician ordered an echo-cardiogram and they moved her to the NICU. The initial Echo didn’t show any abnormality but the cardiologists wanted to see a couple more images. For a few hours we were thinking, ‘oh, maybe this is just a false alarm, like everything else up to this point really has been.’ It took all day to get the 2nd Echo results and when they did come, our worst fear was confirmed. Faith had a heart defect. At that time, the Echo showed that her tricuspid valve was not working at all. The hospital we were at was not equipped to handle an infant cardiac patient so Faith was transferred via ambulance to Children’s Hospital of Milwaukee Wisconsin. A transport team was sent from Milwaukee to the hospital we were at. Around 10 pm that night Faith was on her way to Milwaukee and my husband and I finished the discharge process for me to leave the hospital and left the hospital about 10 minutes after Faith. The first song that came on the radio after we got in the car was What Faith Can Do. My husband and I both started crying and he looked at me and said, ‘she’s going to be ok!’ Then he went on to tell me that before we left the hospital he said a prayer and in that prayer he said that if we heard Faith’s song at all on the way to Milwaukee, it would be a sign that she was going to be fine. When he told me that, I felt like a huge weight had been lifted from my chest and I knew without a doubt that she was going make it through this. When we arrived at Children’s Hospital, a pediatric cardiologist was performing another Echo on Faith and determined that her tricuspid valve wasn’t really the problem. She had an extra flap of tissue above the valve that was blocking flow to the lower right side of her heart. They gave her medication and tried to see if she could push through that tissue on her own. After a few days, they decided that she was going to need surgery. While she was in the hospital, we had the lyrics ” I’ve seen miracles just happen Silent prayers get answered Broken hearts become brand new, That’s what Faith can do!’ on a board in her room. When ever I got discouraged or started worrying I would look at those words and sing Faith’s song to her. When Faith was 8 days old, she underwent open heart surgery to remove that tissue. The doctors were all very encouraging and told us that if we had to choose a heart defect that this would be the one you would choose. It was a pretty straight forward surgery, but it was still open heart surgery on a newborn! The surgery went better than anyone could have expected, and right after surgery, her oxygen saturation was up to 98%!
Everyday while she was in the hospital my husband and I would leave for a few hours to get lunch or whatever to preserve our sanity. Everyday at some point while we were away from the hospital, Faith’s song would come on the radio. Everyday when her song came on, we would both cry, not because we were afraid or sad, but because we knew that she was going to be fine. We knew that God would take care of her. On Thursday, January 13th, (9 days after surgery) Faith was released from the hospital with a clean bill of health. She is now 6 weeks old and other than the small scar on her chest, you would never know that she was born with a heart defect. The doctors have told us there will be no lasting effects from the surgery and the only restriction they have placed on her is that she can never play tackle football.
Everyday I look at this little miracle that God has given us and I thank him. As painful as this whole thing has been, I know that it could have been so much worse and I know it has taught me some very valuable lessons about what is really important in life. I know that God works in mysterious ways and we might not understand his plan, but he does and that’s all that matters. Looking back now we understand why Faith was not born on the 21st. If I had had the c-section as originally planned, we don’t know if the defect would have even been found and if it had I would not have been able to be discharged to go with her to Milwaukee. Also, we would have been in Milwaukee at the hospital for Christmas, instead of at home with all of our kids. God is good and even with everything that has happened the last 6 weeks, I know that I am truly blessed. And now, Faith has one heck of a testimony that she can share with the world.
This is my testimonial of how much Kutless has helped me. This should not be confused of who I am today. I used to live for sin, I used to be sold out on Alcohol. I’m not talking about a few beers here and there. I’m talking about being drunk 24/7. This caused a lot of problems between my family and I. I was very angry, partially because I refused to accept that I needed help. I took my anger out on other people, pushed people away and denied my friendships altogether. I became isolated and a recluse, living in my own world satisfying my own desires. I didn’t care how my attitude affected others, I just didn’t care at all. I didn”t really believe in God. I mean I did, but not to a point of dedicating my life to Him. I didn’t like the idea of putting my future in the hands of someone who was physically intangible. So for so long, I continued to live this way and just slowly digress into a void of self-hate and agony, when chance came my way. I was walking home one day from school, and there was this CD on the ground in the middle of nowhere, it wasn’t even scratched. It was just sitting there as if someone set it there for me to find. On the front of this burned cd it said “Kutless – mix” Having never heard of Kutless before, I had originally thought that this band was Emo, and that Kutless meant they cut themselves to relieve pain and inner-torture. So it caught my attention! I put it in my backpack and got home and put it in my CD player. The First song on there turned out to be Sea of Faces. I started listening, because it sounded good and was expecting some voice to come out screaming about how much life sucks. But instead, there was this soothing calm voice. I thought to myself, oh great, just the opposite of what I was expecting. But, aside from that…I started listening, and it literally described my life up until the Chorus, describing the Sacrifice Christ Jesus did for me. At that point, I turned it off. I didn’t want to hear a Jesus Freak song, I wanted to hear something that could relate to what I was feeling. Interesting thing though, when I turned it off, it turned back on again! Freaked me out, I thought my cd player was messed up or something, but the thing that still boggles my mind to this day is that when it started up again, it must have skipped like 1 or 2 minutes of play time, when it started back up…the words were saying: “If only my one heart was all you’d gain from all it comes, well I know you would have still been a man, with a reason to willingly offer your life.” Powerful words right there, Powerful! Enough to make me keep listening. I felt something right away. Something I’ve never felt before. It was attractive and soothing. True and Complete Peace filled my heart. I was so confused, mainly from the fact that this all happened by chance. That I found this CD on my way home randomly, that my CD Player turned on by itself in the right place at the right time. That I felt a presence in my heart that gave me peace. As I continued to listen to the CD, the next song was “Strong Tower.” Listening to this song, I was thinking that maybe this was all happening for a reason. Again, this song described my life with the lyrics: “when I’m stranded in the valley, and I’m tired and all alone, it seems like I’ve lost my way.” Wow, again pinpointing my problems in my life. But again describing the Love of God. The peace that His love can provide. It was very appealing. At this point, I was completely and utterly confused, scared even. I needed to take a walk, though it was like 5pm and getting dark, I decided to. I walked about half a mile when I came up to bus stop, and sat down for a moment to rest. And to my surprise and confusion, yet again….it seemed someone had left a Bible on the seat next to me. I began to think to myself, “am I on camera or something, is this Christian punk’d or something?” I honestly thought at that point, someone was playing a huge prank on me. But that